ST. JOHN'S, N.L. — When I wrote in my last column about the signs of spring, I left a big one out; thinking about getting the body ready for summer.
Thinking about is not the same as actually working on it, but it’s a start.
I’m more concerned with getting my legs stronger than I am with getting it thinner so I’ve been walking, or logging steps as I call it.
I told you about the steps. I’m not burning up the pedometer, but I’m definitely walking a lot more than when I wasn’t step-conscious and I am pushing myself.
The other day, I pushed a cart for over 2,000 steps around Home Depot. I wasn’t shopping, just getting steps.
From my chair to the fridge takes 32 steps.
Losing weight is so much easier. All you have to do is decide which weight loss method you want to use.
Here are some choices, straight off the Internet.
There’s a weight loss pill that naturally burns fat that got the pill producers the biggest deal in Dragon’s Den history. Taking this pill claims it can help you lose up to 30 pounds of stomach flab in just one month.
It is produced by a couple of sisters named Samantha and Anna.
I’m not burning up the pedometer, but I’m definitely walking a lot more than when I wasn’t step-conscious and I am pushing myself.
Then there’s a weight loss supplement that got the creators the biggest deal in Shark Tank history that naturally burns fat and helps you lose an average of 21 pounds in a month and will keep it off as long as you keep taking the supplement.
It was created by two sisters named Samantha and Anna.
Hmmm?
Search and you will find some fantastic weight loss methods for you to try. (I use fantastic’ in its true meaning of unbelievable or farfetched, rather than the commonly misused meaning of terrific or great).
Did you know that you can get a powder to sprinkle on your food that makes it smell and taste even better, so you eat less and therefore lose weight? It tastes better, so you eat less. Hmmm?
How about caffeine-infused underwear that destroys fat cells or a slimming and toning formula that mirrors the hormone lobsters produce to get skinny and wiggle free of their shells.
Dr. Oz endorses a green coffee extract that can eliminate 10 per cent of your bodyweight, but he’s going to run for the Republicans, so I can’t take him seriously.
Seriously though, I actually am drinking something I call joy juice every day which is touted to melt the fat off my belly. It is a simple homemade health drink made with apple cider vinegar, honey, lemon juice, tumeric and cinnamon.
Apple cider vinegar is purported to do everything from treating dandruff to diminishing the process of aging to preventing cancer to reducing swelling in the vagina. (You can’t make this stuff up.)
Other professed benefits include removing toxins, regulating blood sugar levels, suppressing appetite, improving digestion, boosting the immune system, lowering cholesterol, improving skin health, increasing energy and, yes, aiding weight loss.
I’ve been having a hot mug of it every morning for about a month. I have to admit to noticing no difference whatsoever in my appetite, skin condition, energy or weight, but I assume it’s not doing me any harm and makes me feel that I am surely helping my body in some way. If nothing else, I’m hoping my liver will thank me.
Other more reliable methods of weight loss are hanging your skinny dress on the fridge door and keeping chocolate and baked goods in the freezer so you can’t eat them on impulse.
Slogans might help.
“To lose that gut, get off your butt!”
“Eat your veggies — have less wedgies”! (How can you take a slogan seriously when it uses less where it should use fewer?)
My mother used to say “think of the man who died eating” when she saw us overindulging. I don’t know who he was, but I should start thinking of him again.
Janice Wells writes from St. John’s.
JANICE WELLS: Watch what you don't eat — don't overindulge yourself in untried and untrue dieting gimmicks - Saltwire
Read More
No comments:
Post a Comment